Have I Spammed Your Blog Site? This is Why?

I learned yesterday that I had being “Spamming” other bloggers’ sites (obs). I read Olivia Lucie Blake’s post, “How to support other bloggers,” and it disheartened me to realize that I might have spammed her and others unintentionally.

If I have visited your site either as a follower or randomly via Readers’ Discover or Following, and have “spammed” you, please forgive me.

The blog stated, among other things, that one spams to seek attention. Here’s my comment on the site:

“I love your posts, Olivia, though I don’t stop by daily as much as I’d like. Your posts are informative. This post is both good and interesting. I do what you’ve tagged as “Spam” not because I want or need the attention but because I’ve been away and missed the site/owner. I will usually stay on sites and posts I like when I have ample time in a bid to make up for the lost days so to speak. Loving all missed posts and liking other peoples’ comments (opc) on another’s site, from your post, connotes Spam. Though it’s now made me realize that others don’t see that (my actions) the way I do. It takes the fun and appreciation of others contributions away. There were opc I resisted liking as a result. Please let me know if I misunderstood. 😍”

I hope that the comment speaks for itself.

I love blogging and loving on other bloggers as much as I possibly can when time permits. The chief among those whom I have “spammed” is Banter Republic. He has been a sport not complaining either he realizes it’s clean support or he’s simply being a gentleman.

I was also on Kwoted on Friday and spent ample time reading, liking, and commenting on posts and opc. Kathy good-heartedly responded to all my comments.

I have also being “spammed” a few times and have never taken it negatively. I also have someone with the same photo but different site names visited my site several times. Though I checked the sites out, I hardly dwell on their actions or intentions.

I’m sure that we all agree that supporting one another is essential and motivating. Liking and commenting on other bloggers’ sites (obs) and opc is my way of such support. If I have visited your site and or commented on your comment on obs, and you object to it, please feel free to let me know. It was done with clean heart and totally in love. One person’s meat is another’s poison so I do understand now that not everyone welcomes it. But how am I to know since there are no rules or laws governing such, short of acting decently and ethically.

True that the actions of a few have necessitated grouping all together, it’s still nice to give each other some benefits of doubt.

I am content with who I am and where my blog is presently. I’m presently blogging primarily to share, having fun at it, and definitely not an attention seeker.

Nonetheless, it’s good to know and I’ll resist the urge to comment on opc or several posts at once on obs going forward.

Love and Peace

The Mystery is Over

I self-award myself The Mystery Blogger Award as I have blogged anonymously over the year. During the period, I have been asked “what’s your name?” to which I had (I hope, politely) requested to simply be addressed as “ThinkTalk.” I also use Thinker-Talker as my name on most sites. But I did consider revealing a bit of my identity on my Blogiversary when I commented on one post some weeks ago. I’m now unsure whose post it was.

ThinkTalk is the blog of a real, genuine, authentic, but frank daughter of God, called Funmi (long name is “OluwaFunmiLayo”which means God gives me joy. ThinkTalk is a space for all that I represent and would like to see in people and the world, including outlet to share lessons learned over my years on planet earth. I am passionate about some things, love Jesus The Christ, and wonder why there is evil, wickedness, and hate in the world. It’s unnecessary and still believe that there is always an opportunity for light to shine amidst the dark and gloomy.

The original name the site started with was FunmiTalks. Though I liked it, I wanted more focus on the Think-ing than Talk-ing and preferred not to link my name to it. I still prefer the anonymity.

I’m based in the American continent; West Coast of the United States of America. Originally from the oldest continent (let’s see if you know your history or geography) (smile).

I love my privacy, I’m private and an introvert, but the extrovert part of me rears its head occasionally. I concluded that I must be an extroverted-introvert. I sometimes wonder if I need to petition Myers-Briggs because it’s always scoring me as an INTJ; only once did I get an INTP. Well maybe the personality type was true for a while. With maturity and life experiences, I wonder if I have radically changed. Will have to retake the test to find out.

I believe that greater difference would be made in the world if people paused to ponder (think) before talking or acting. Words can hurt, words do hurt, and hurtful words are more damaging than physical wounds. Hence, the site ThinkTalk and its tag “Let’s reason together.” I believe that it’s totally alright for people to disagree, but much better to reason together from the center of our agreement. And that if we take time to reason together, we might be able to understand each other better.

Being Reasonable

“In everyday life, we ask each other to be reasonable, and we fault unreasonable behavior in ourselves and others. Moreover, the Anglo-American legal system makes extensive use of the “reasonable person standard” in everything from negligence to administrative law. What is it to be a reasonable person? What do we mean by “reasonable”?”

. . .

The above is a brief course description of the class, “Being Reasonable.” I have always wanted to take classes in Philosophy to satisfy my learning curiosity/developments. I came across the course description while researching colleges. It’s being taught at one of America’s top colleges. I would love to take the class at the college, but I thought to share the course title and description which I think are interesting.

Philosophy is deep and involves lots of independence of the mind. Just look at the list of philosophical schools of thoughts. I do not need a degree in Philosophy so I will not avail myself of all the schools of thoughts. However, I think it interesting to know that tons of our rationales and beliefs are philosophically-based.

What does “Reasonable” Mean?

We start with the Dictionary’s definition:

Next, according to Vocabulary.com, “If you’re reasonable, you have good sense and judgment. A reasonable decision is rational and thought out, like your mom’s reasonable rule about not eating crumbly foods in her car. When you describe a store’s prices as reasonable, you mean they’re fair — not too high. And if you are given a reasonable amount of time to do a project for school, you have no excuse for it being late.”

As the course description stated, there’s the “reasonable person standard,” in law. According to Cornell University’s Department of Law, it means:

“Just, rational, appropriate, ordinary, or usual in the circumstances. It may refer to care, cause, compensation, doubt (in a criminal trial), and a host of other actions or activities. In the law of negligence, for example, the reasonable person standard is the standard of care that a reasonably prudent person would observe under a given set of circumstances. An individual who subscribes to such standards can avoid liability for negligence.”

I have provided two links for your reading pleasure; one from a philosophical view and the other from an actuarial view.

Conclusion

There is actually no conclusion to reasonability or being reasonable. As you can see, being reasonable depends on the hat one is wearing at the point the statement is made. Since each industry views “reasonable” from its own perspective, is it safe to say that we all will have varied thoughts and views for what we consider as Being Reasonable?

What are your thoughts on this? Please comment below. Thanks.

Attitude towards Yourself

Credits: Valentina Conde / Unsplash

Attitude. Attitude. Attitude. We’ve all heard the saying that attitude is everything. It is your attitude that will determine your altitude. Attitude is the equalizer; it’s what makes one or breaks one.

“The greatest discovery of any generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes.”

William James, Harvard University

What is Attitude?

The best definition of Attitude that I found is from Myers’ Social Psychology where Attitude is defined as “a favorable or unfavorable evaluative reaction toward something or someone, exhibited in ones beliefs, feelings, or intended behavior. It is a social orientation – an underlying inclination to respond to something either favorably or unfavorably.”

Attitude towards Yourself

Attitude towards others is one thing, but I believe that our attitude towards ourselves are more important than those towards others. I also believe that there is a direct correlation in one’s attitude towards others and self. If you treat yourself better, you will undoubtedly treat others like you do yourself.

Attitude towards yourself:

  1. can be positive, negative, and/or neutral towards an “attitude object” (a person, behaviour or event).”
  2. is intangible, but the effects are tangible.
  3. is directly inferred and observable. So is the effects of attitude be it positive, negative, or neutral.
  4. is both implicit and explicit.

Attitude towards ourselves determine our attitude toward the world. If you believe that you can, guess what, you will. On the contrary, if you believe that you can’t, guess what, you will not. We shape our own lives and the shapes of them will be determined by our attitudes. For example, a person with a poor attitude towards learning, isn’t going to learn much until he or she changes his or her attitude.

. . .

We’re so familiar with ourselves we tend to take ourselves for granted and we tend to minimize the things we can accomplish, or the goals we can reach, and for some equally strange reason believe that others can accomplish things in our field which we cannot. There are literally millions of human beings living narrow, darkened, frustrated, and defensive lives simply because they take offensive and doubtful attitude towards themselves and as a result towards life in general.

Attitude is a reflection; a result of a person’s will. It is incalculably powerful. It can bring about marvelous results for us but we need to train it patiently day-by-day.

Let’s talk about the attitudes of successful people. The top 5% of people go sailing through life from one success to another and, even when they fail at something, shrug it off and head right out again. No matter who the person is or what he/she does, wherever you find a person doing an outstanding job and getting outstanding results, you will find a person with the right kind of attitude. These people take the attitude towards themselves that they can accomplish what they set out to accomplish. There’s no good reason on earth why they can’t be competent or successful. They have a healthy attitude towards themselves and, as a result, towards life and the things they want to accomplish. And because of this they achieve some remarkable things and they come to be successful, outstanding, brilliant, lucky, and a lot of other things. They’re quite frequently no more brilliant or outstanding than the majority of the people by whom they are surrounded but they did develop the right attitude and they found their accomplishments not too difficult and, many times, surprisingly easy simply because it seems that so few are really trying and really believing in themselves.

Successful people come in all shapes and sizes and in widely varying degrees of intelligence background and so on. But they all have one thing in common:

  1. they expect more good out of life than bad;
  2. they expect to succeed more than they fail;
  3. they radiate confidence assurance;
  4. they have about them the attitude of success in their walk, talk, and even dressing.

. . .

If you think you have a bad or negative attitude, you’re probably right. But choose to change it today. The distance between the negative attitude and positive is the amount it took you to read this sentence. Your intentional decision to change. Start today. Start now so you can reap the benefits of the best positive attitude towards yourself tomorrow.

Cooking with Unmis: Chicken Corn Soup

Ingredients:

  • Chicken parts (cut in small chunks)
  • Frozen (Sweet) Corn
  • Salt
  • Chicken bouillon
  • 2 Eggs
  • Tofu (optional)

Cooking Instructions:

  1. Place the cut small chunks of chicken in a pot
  2. Cube 1/2 onion
  3. Add salt
  4. Add couple of Chicken Bouillon
  5. Add 2-3 cups of water
  6. Cover and bring to boil; cook over medium heat for 5 minutes.
  7. Add 1 cup of corn
  8. Cook for another 3-5 minutes (or till corn is tender)
  9. Reduce heat to low
  10. Crack the eggs into soup
  11. Stir
  12. Remove after a minute.

Enjoy your Chicken Corn Soup alone or with fresh slice of bread or rolls.

Note: the chicken can be substituted with turkey or shrimp.

Part 2: Following/Unfollowing on Social Media

Following/Unfollowing on Social Media

http://think-talk.org/2021/01/13/following-unfollowing-on-social-media/
— Read on think-talk.org/2021/01/13/following-unfollowing-on-social-media/

My blogging family!

I have questions for you. Please help by answering the following. Thank you!


  1. True or False: Following/Unfollowing is a part of social media terrain.
  2. Is blogging a part of social media?
  3. Do you think Following/Unfollowing belongs in the blogging community?
  4. Why do you think bloggers Follow/Unfollow?
  5. What advice/suggestion do you have for those who Follow/Unfollow blogs/bloggers?
  6. Any advice for those saddened by Follow/Unfollow?

I believe that we all are learning and can glean from each other. Your answers, in the comments, will help us all.

Also share any experience regarding the topic that you might have had.

I appreciate your time and participation. 😍✌🏾

Thoughts: Mine, Others, Whose?!

close-up photo of Thought Catalog book
Credits: Unsplash

I don’t wanna ever embrace again some people’s Thoughts of me,

those thoughts have hurt and made me temporarily delusional.

Yet I would like to embrace some people’s Thoughts of me,

For those have motivated me to believe higher for myself.

I don’t even wanna embrace some Thoughts of myself sometimes;

for who knows where those thoughts came from

As I am aware that there’s a wrestling match going on between my mind and members

that sometimes the good that I intend to do I do not; and the evil that I don’t intend to do I find myself doing. (Romans 7:8-24)

Yet the Thoughts that I think of myself matter more.

I better think thoughts that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, and of good report or rapport. (Philippians 4:8)

And thoughts of peace, and not of evil, so I can attain His expected end for me. (Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11‬)

For these are the Thoughts of my Creator which matters most than any thought I or anyone may have of me.

So, align myself I must with His thoughts of me.

No matter what anyone thinks of me,

I have to agree with their verbalized thoughts and visualize myself being so for it to materialize!

I don’t ever want to think too highly of myself again

Nor embrace the lowly thoughts of others.

Father, I pray Thee help me and us all to have Your balance in our Thoughts.

. . .

This poetic post was inspired while I was commenting on Kally’s (#Middleme) Weekly Wisdom for the day. Please visit her awesome site for the post and more. I love her posts and I hope that you do too.

A Rose Just For You

To my WP family and friends

The recognition is all from you. The 🌹 is just for you.

I’d send the rose 🌹 to each person for not only liking my posts, but also following, sharing, and commenting.

But I don’t have your physical mailing addresses for FTD (Floral Direct) or Amazon to deliver to you;

But hope you’ll accept this online roses 🌹, straight outta my heart and specially hand-picked from the Unsplash garden, to you; one for each ‘like’ and share and comment and follow. Please leave some for the next liker, follower, commenter, and sharer.

You make it all worth the while.

Love you dearly my blogging clan!

#Gottfried #BanterRepublic

I couldn’t keep this to myself, people.

I would like to introduce to my esteemed WordPress family, and share with others, Gottfried of Banter Republic. I discovered the site and owner today. It has been a hilarious day since discovery. I haven’t laughed so hard in days.

Well, maybe I fibbed on that. I am not one to fib, but lately I’ve been told that I seem to forget some things. Who Me? Forget anything? No way! I still remember things and events from my kindergarten!!! 😆 You know, I realized that some naysayers like to take others down with them. 🤦🏾‍♀️ But I ain’t going down with noone.

Trouble knocked at the door, but, hearing laughter, hurried away. – Benjamin Franklin

Anyhow, I meant to say that I remembered laughing hard at my nephew’s first birthday over the weekend when one of the guests, who happened to be a Trump loyalists, was “pounced” on for not wearing his MAGA cap. He was a minority in the crowd, but took it all in stride. I had never seen him so flustered – his melatonin helped concealed his blushes such that I hysterically laughed for several minutes! Having a back-to-back laughing bout days is healing!

. . .

I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It’s probably the most important thing in a person.

Audrey Hepburn

As I was saying, I discovered Gottfried and his site via the WordPress Readers.

I share below a couple of his posts. I hope you will agree with me that he is an intelligentsia with/in humor. He’s also very responsive to comments – a trait that every blogger must have. He was responding to my comments simultaneously as I was still on his site reading, laughing, and commenting.

Please click here to visit the posts and his site. Also share your thoughts/comments below.

Please don’t stop …

#Gottfried #BanterRepublic. I’m glad that I discovered you. As I have commented – I love the humor expressed in your posts. The ability to make people laugh is a gift and falls under the gift of healing. I was healed (from weariness that comes from back-to-back family gatherings) this morning after reading your posts as I laughed so hard. I hope that you will give us more.

Please keep it up.

R A P E

Rape is never a pleasant thing to talk about. It sends shivers down my spines. But, it’s an issue we find ourselves talking about today. It’s an issue dear to The Eternal Word’s heart. It is an issue everyone should be concerned about.

It’s also an issue that has no cultural, race, age, or socio-economic boundaries. To learn more, read the following:

Sex vs. RAPE

Having sex is meant to be a special thing between two loving adults. It is meant to be an enjoyable experience with the right person.

Sex is never supposed to be had with a minor! It is illegal and whosoever does so is a pedophile. Such person is punishable under the law! Even the religions and cultures that allow such acts should be banned as they are perpetuating an illegal act!!!

RAPE is forceful sex, against the victim’s will. When sex is forceful, it is evil concupiscence (Colossians 3:5-6). If the person says “NO” and pushes, please STOP, they mean “NO!” Never think that the person is playing hard to get. Respect the person. No one enjoys forced sex; except that the perpetrator satisfies an evil desire/longing.

What adrenaline, or is it testosterone, flows uninhibited through the veins and arteries of one to defile another?! The mere thought of RAPE gives me chills as one with high fever.

Effects

RAPE victims suffer psychologically, emotionally, and mentally after a RAPE ordeal. Some of the consequences could be long-term if the victims are not treated or seek counseling/therapies. Additionally, most victims suffer shame and self-blame. Because of this, the majority of RAPE incidents are not reported or even shared with family members and/or friends leaving the victim to suffer the trauma alone.

PTSD is real with RAPE victims, so also is depression, panic attacks, and anxiety. Some victims also struggle with self esteem.

Life is hard enough as it is, why dump more on anyone? Rapists must be STOPPED and brought to justice. Anyone who has ever raped another must repent.

. . .

RAPE must be categorized as a pandemic issue. We all nust do our part to STOP it locally and globally. Please do your part people.

RAPE Myths

Understand the myths about rape or sexual violence as compiled by Rape Crisis, U.K.. For the corresponding Facts on each Myth, please visit their website https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-informed/about-sexual-violence/myths-vs-realities/

  1. If someone gets really drunk, it’s their own fault if they end up getting raped. They should have kept themselves safe.
  2. Women often lie about rape because they regret having sex with someone, or because they want attention.
  3. If someone didn’t scream or try to fight their attacker off, then it wasn’t rape.
  4. If you are in a relationship with someone, it’s always OK to have sex with them.
  5. People who were sexually abused as children are likely to become abusers themselves.
  6. Women shouldn’t go out alone at night as they are likely to get raped.
  7. Women provoke men to rape them by wearing revealing clothes or flirting.
  8. Once a man is sexually aroused he can't help himself; he has to have sex.
  9. When it comes to sex, women and girls give out mixed signals. They sometimes 'play hard to get' and say 'no' when they really mean 'yes'. 
  10. Men of certain races and backgrounds are more likely to commit sexual violence.
  11. Men don't get raped.
  12. Women don’t commit sexual offences.

. . .

Need more information or gelp for your locality on how/what you can do to help end RAPE, Click here.

Let’s end this pandemic.

Thanks for reading. Please share.

Help, Lord!

Bible in One Year 2020 with Nicky Gumbel – Day 203 – Devotional

Sharing the Devotional from the Bible in One Year 2020. To read more and read daily, click this url https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/17704/day/203?segment=0

One of my most frequent prayers is ‘Help!’ It is also one of the most common prayers in the Bible. It is a prayer you can pray every day, in any and every situation. You can cry out to the Lord for help. God’s desire is for you to have a relationship with Him that is real and from the heart.

Psalm 88:9b-18

Help in broken relationships

Rejection is always hurtful – especially when it comes from someone you love or someone very close to you. Broken relationships are painful – particularly when we feel we have been ‘dumped’ by a ‘lover’, a ‘neighbour’ or a close friend. The psalmist feels that since ‘lover and neighbour alike dump me; the only friend I have left is Darkness’ (v.18, MSG).

He says, ‘For as long as I remember I’ve been hurting’ (v.15, MSG). The situation seems like one of utter hopelessness: darkness (v.12), feeling rejected by God (v.14), affliction (v.15a), terror and despair (v.15b). ‘I’m bleeding, black-and-blue… I’m nearly dead’ (v.17, MSG).

Yet there is one note of hope. The hope comes from the fact that, in the midst of all this, he chooses to start each day by crying out to God: ‘I call to you, O Lord, every day; I spread out my hands to you’ (v.9b).

Perhaps today you’re struggling with a relationship: in your marriage, workplace, church or with a close friend. However bad your situation may seem, there is always hope if you cry out to the Lord for help.

‘I cry to you for help, O Lord; in the morning my prayer comes before you’ (v.13). O Lord, I spread out my hands to you. I ask you for help…

Psalm 88:13

. . .

May God help us all in our time(s) of need when we sincerely cry out to Him. He will never let us down.

Why does God allow good people to die sooner and allow the wicked to live?

Father God forgive me as I write this because you expect me to know better. But, sometimes I don’t. This instance is one of those times that it’s still hard to swallow.

Sorry that I sound like a child when I should be talking like your mature daughter. But there are times the kid in us rears its head and one who is known for wisdom talks or acts foolishly.

Forgive me Father God.

It’s been five years since you allowed my brother, MO, to depart this world.

It still hurts like it happened yesterday for he was taken in his prime.

My brother, you’ll forever be missed. I “slept all these years” hoping that it would be a dream for the grief was too deep.

But alas I had to wake up and accept that you’re really no longer present with us.

To be absent in the body, is to be present with the Lord

2 Corinthians 5:8

I take solace in the fact that God knows best and that you’re at peace; no more striving.

I miss you dearly, my brother. You were one of a kind; the family reconciler; Dad’s right-hand man; kind-hearted; always going the extra mile for anyone in need; you were a friend indeed and a loving father.

Let the wicked repent

I remember your statement when Grandma died. You said, “the wicked has done their worst, Mama lived 101 years on earth.”

I pondered on it and finally understood what you meant.

Well, may the wicked never die again. Sarcastic. Should they not repent and turn from their wicked ways, may they be like chaff before the wind and may the angels of the Lord drive them out. (Isaiah 17:13)

We all miss you.

Continue to rest in peace.

Love-first model for marriage and relationships

We posed the question, in our previous blog, should-love-or-marriage-be-based-on-a-business-or-love-first-model.

We talked about the business-first model and what relationships would be like if we adopted that model. If you missed it, click bit.ly/2Czm55T to read it.

Today, we review the other type of relationship; love-first model. It should be a no-brainer that relationships are based on love, right? No! It’d amaze even Venus that it’s not so!

What is love?

Dictionary.com https://www.dictionary.com/browse/love offers a few definitions of: ‘love’ as:

  • a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person;
  • sexual passion or desire.
  • a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

What is the love-first model?

It is the kind that marriages and relationships ought to be about. It is also the kind where each edifies the other above one self. The Bible provides us with a standard:

“Love suffers long, and is kind;

love envies not;

love vaunts not itself, is not puffed up,

Love does not behave itself unseemly, seeks not his/her own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil;

Love rejoices not in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never fails: ….”

‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13:4-8‬ ‭KJV

This is the utmost kind of relationship everyone desires and/or should aspire to. But how do we get it?

How can we enter into this ideal model?

I believe that this kind of relationship is possible when men wisely choose their ladies and the ladies patiently wait for their other half to search them out. Then, there is dignity, mutual respect, and appreciation in love.

If marriages and relationships are based on the love-first model, there will be no occurrences of separation, divorce, or leaving one another. The relationship one enters into, will culminate into marriages till death does one or both apart. That, to me, is the ideal kind!

But since we do have incidents of separation and divorces, is’t then safe to say that either one of the parties chose the wrong partner to begin with or that one or both entered into the relationship under pretense or that the marriage or relationship was entered into for the wrong reasons? Maybe? Only both parties can tell.

Your choice

Now that you know what love really is, which would you choose as your model for marriage or relationship; the business-first or the love-first?

For the love-first model, pray and have a confirmation in your spirit that you are choosing wisely because the alternative (aka wrong choice) can be disastrous.

Love and Peace!

Should love or marriage be based on a business- or love-first model?

“What’s in it for me?” “You rub my back and I rub yours (or scratch or poke yours depending on how I’m feeling about you! Lol). Sounds so cold, unh? Yet, these selfish and shamefacedly statements have now become cliches in households.

Why does anything have to be in it for you? What about the other person? Why have we starved love and become so hungry for the $dollar (or money, for those who don’t spend the almighty currency!)? What happened to us all?

I could rant endlessly in the hope that some “expert” somewhere could answer my questions.

With the above outlooks on love/marriage, falling in love or getting married becomes scary. Should it? Let’s talk about it and consider both models.

Business-first model

Dictionary.com defines ‘Business’ as:
https://www.dictionary.com/browse/business

  1. an occupation, profession, or trade:
  2. the purchase and sale of goods in an attempt to make a profit.
  3. a person, partnership, or corporation engaged in commerce, manufacturing, or a service; profit-seeking enterprise or concern.

Marriage is honorable …” Hebrews 13:4a

Types of businesses

There are different types of businesses; the top four are:

  1. Sole proprietorship
  2. Partnership
  3. Corporations
  4. Limited Liability Companies.

The business-first model in marriage is similar to a Partnership. In all businesses, it is wise to have an agreement/contract that clarifies expectations. The contract in marriage is called the Prenuptial Agreement or Prenups, for short.

My humble opinion is that prenups are business-in-marriage documents that should have no place when the marriage is grounded in love.

However, I can envisage why one person (or both) favors prenups before entering into the marriage.

For your information, prenups are not relegated to famous and wealthy folks. Average, everyday, working-class people have been known to request prenups before marrying. I wonder why anyone would marry prenuptially! Personally, I won’t.

Comment below if you would marry someone who presents you with a prenup. If not, why not? Thanks.

If a business model is applied to marriage, it implies that three scenarios are imminent:

  1. either one person profits, and the other losses;
  2. both parties win; or
  3. both parties lose!

Let’s expatiate on each scenario in reverse order

The third scenario (both parties lose; lose-lose) means that the outcome was a fallout, separation, or divorce. Is it safe to say then that both parties were misfits to start with? What caused a fallout or the ultimate decision of a divorce? What differences were so grave that could not have been forgiven, or as Californian courts will rule, were irreconcilable? Are we so callous with one another such that we take the “it’s my way or the highway!” stance? Maybe, we all should choose our significant others wisely before heading on the crooked road.

The second scenario (both parties win; win-win) is the ideal. But remember that the goal of starting a business is to make a profit; aka ROI, return on investment. In a marriage, what would those investments be? Using children as an example, as I couldn’t think of a better one,. Neither party didn’t begin the marriage with children. Each party brought something; the man contributed his sperm and the woman her eggs. “The profit” is the children?! What would we say about those in a second or third marriage who brought children into the new marriage. Blended home profit? What other examples can be used? Furniture, cars, etc. with the outcome (profit) being a home?! Maybe. What if one party does not have the furniture or cars? Should they still start a “business” together or the items become “ours” rather than mine or yours? Or as in a real business partnership, the type of partnership will be defined; that is, who would be the active, dormant/sleeping, limited powers, etc. partner? I’ll like to hear your thoughts on this.

With this scenario, it appears that both parties made the right choice of “business” partner, right? We all might need to take cue(s) from this type of business-first love/marriage.
How then would the profits be divided? 50/50 or ratio relative to your contribution?

The first scenario (win-loss) is a troublesome one. Were both parties, the onset, aware of what the outcome would be? Why would anyone knowingly enter into a losing business? Were there any part of the contract that was latent, ambiguous, or intentionally omitted? If so, should there still be a contract – shouldn’t the contract be voidable, void, and/or rescinded? Let’s ponder on these for a moment. Some relationships are doomed even before they begin because everyone saw and knew that it was never meant to be nor was it going to last. Only the people involved couldn’t see nor know it! I could name a few examples but I don’t want to be litigated! You probably know one or two as well.

. . .

Each of the above scenarios is worth pondering on. If you or I were to enter into a marriage or relationship, which scenario would you or I choose as our ideal? I know for sure that I would 💯 choose the second win-win scenario and I hope that you would, too.

What could humanity do to avoid a losing love/marriage? What sustainable relationship tips can we pass on that can help others and especially the younger generation?

Please comment below.

We’ll continue with the other model, Love-first in our next blog. Till then,

Love & Peace

Thanks for reading.

Woohoo . . . Thank You!

I had eagerly anticipated hitting 50 followers and it’s finally here. Better still, it came sooner than I had expected it.

Thank you 🙏🏾😍 Trafficzionmethod and JJ Smith for being my first two followers. You both gave me the break.

Thank you 🙏🏾🙏🏾😍😍WordPress family for the encouragement, motivation, and inspiration. I cherish the likes and comments and enjoy replying to them. I equally love each follower’s website and content. You all seem to do it effortlessly.

Much appreciation to the WordPress Staff behind the scenes. You all are difference makers. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾😍😍😍

. . .

I wrote my first two blogs, [Who Am I?], [We Yearn and Thirst For] on April 19, 2020 and didn’t write another till ten days later. I started slow but finally “getting my groove” (credits to Terry MacMillan) on blogging.

Thank you all for the support. ❤️❤️❤️

Peace!

Love me

Caption by Think-Talk

Love me

Not for my looks

‘Cause those will soon fade away;

Not for my smarts

For those were given to me

And could be taken away;

Not for my money

‘Cause you might detest me when it’s gone.

Love me

Just for me.

If for my looks you came

Know that you’ll disappear

When the bulges come

Or the grays sip in.

If for my smarts

When God forbid dementia visits

I know you’ll become the guest and the owner not.

If for my moolah

Know that it is not just for you

For a million mouths

I have chosen to feed.

If you’ll stay

Stay then you must

Not for my looks

Or smarts

Or moolah

But for me

So love me

Just for who I am.

Who I am is within

It’s not found in the looks

Or smarts

Or moolah

It is found in my heart

Which is yet to be seen and explored

By you.

Love me

Just for me! ❤️

110 days from today …

What are you going to do?

Whatever you do, do it totally with your heart knowing that you have read, watched, and studied, all that needs to be digested. That, above all, you have studied “to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. But shun profane and vain babblings: for they will increase unto more ungodliness.”
‭‭(2 Timothy‬ ‭2:15-16‬)

Whatever you do 110 days from today, please seriously refrain from groupthink or bandwagon effect of joining the acts or desires of the populace.

Finally, whatever you do, stop, pray, and ponder to ask yourself, will I be able to live with myself after this or will I regret having acted contrary to the truth and my heart.

I say pray because often not all that appears good are of God. I repeat, everything that looks, feel, and or sound good are not of God. Few are obvious to the naked eye, but many are discreet that will fool even the very elect (Matthew 24:24b). Be not one of those who think that God can be mocked for whatsoever we sow, we shall reap (Galatians 6:7-8).

. . .

The frailty of humanity is that we focus on the negatives of the past and of one another and sadly forget the good of both the past and one another. Psychologists confirm that this is how our brains are hardwired and term it negativity bias. Click the links below to read more on the term:

. . .

In 110 days from today, I implore you to focus on merits rather than the negatives and VOTE with your heart for the Truth.

You have ample time to research and digest each candidate and, of course, each proposition.. Start today so that 110 days from today, you will know what to do and will do that which you ought to have done.

. . .

America is presently in a dire state. But there’s hope still for by His mercies, America shall not be consumed because great is His faithfulness! (Lanentations 3:22-24)

Let your voice be heard; exercise your civic right and let your vote count. No excuses. You can Vote by mail. Check out information on how to now and be ready to vote 110 days from today.

Peace!

Love and Love Languages

How do you love yourself or allow yourself to be loved? Are you the flower person, chocolates, wine and dine, just-hold-my-hands kind of person? Or do you prefer the long (phone/face-to-face) conversations? Whatever your preference, wouldn’t you like your significant other to know, or you knowing your children’s; if you have any?

Wouldn’t you also like to know the type of love your relationship (or marriage) is exhibiting?

Well, if you already don’t know, we all speak various love languages. These languages often can be misconstrued. Knowing the different types of love and love languages can set relationships straight.

. . .

Biblically, there are four types of love. Jack Zavada writes about Eros, Storge, Philia, and Agape in his article. Click here to read more https://www.thoughtco.com/types-of-love-in-the-bible-700177.

Agape is the highest form of love. It’s the God-kind of Love which we all should aspire to.

. . .

Psychologically, there are seven types of Love. Neel Burton M.D. adds three more to the biblical types. I learned something as these three are all new to me. To read them, please click here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hide-and-seek/201606/these-are-the-7-types-love.

Did you learn something new as well? Yes or No, please comment below.

There’s however an eighth kind that I’ll like to add.

Mania (obsessive/excessive) love. This kind of love can manifest in the other seven, maybe six (excluding Agape) if not checked.

Love Languages

Love has a language. They are Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

Speaking the wrong language is akin to someone speaking Swahili to a Greek. Result is chaos, (love) clutter, and reciprocity failure. It is important to know one’s love language as well as one’s spouse, children, and/or close friends.

According to Dr. Gary Chapman, “it helps strengthen relationships … as different people with different personalities express love in different ways.

Interested in finding out your love language, click here [https://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/]. Each of us have a primary (dominant) language. We can also have a secondary (recessive) language as well as multiple love languages.

Have fun discovering your love language. And should you feel like sharing, do so in the Reply/Comments below.

Wisdom nugget: Today


In choosing whatever you want and however you live your life today,
remember tomorrow.

Whatever you do today,
Will you be proud of it tomorrow.

Whatever you do today,
Think of how you’ll explain it to your child/children or the one you love the most tomorrow,

Whatever you do that brings you comfort and money today,
Think of the comfort and more money it might take away tomorrow.

If it will give you sleepless nights tomorrow,
Be wise and wave it bye bye today

But we never know what tomorrow brings
So be wise today
And ask your Creator
If this is what He wants for you
Today!

😍🙏🏾✌🏾

An apropos for the remainder of the year

Today is Day 190 of the calendar and we’ve just begun the second half of 2020.

With COVID-19 and its effect on everyone and the economy, the ongoing unrest, including the upcoming elections, we, as well as our nation, are nearing a seemingly turning point.

I believe in miracles and we need the hand of God to steer us all and orchestrate a divine intervention.

This prayer is therefore apropos for us all for the rest of the year.

I pray that it resonates with you. Stay blessed.

BBC – Science & Nature – Human Body and Mind – Spot The Fake Smile

Spot The Fake Smile Survey
— Read on www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/mind/surveys/smiles/

. . .

Can you spot a fake smile from a genuine one? According to U.K.’s BBC, “Most people are surprisingly bad at spotting fake smiles. One possible explanation for this is that it may be easier for people to get along if they don’t always know what others are really feeling.

Would you rather just get along with people or would you rather seek genuine friendships/relationships? For some, the answer might be “it depends.” I’d rather have the genuine.

. . .

I took this survey in one of my classes in college and scored 18 out of 20. Not bad, right?! But I wish I got it all! That two fake smiles could unknowingly cause a disaster or two if allowed to slip. Please don’t mind me – just revealing my competitive side 😀

I just found my result of the survey and wanted to share for a mid-week challenge.

. . .

We’re all in a haste to get things done that these days, no one stops to breathe or rest any more. (One reason that COVID-19 was a welcome breather of sorts!) We run about like the fable Chicken Little such that we miss the little things that matter. A fake smile and/or body language are two of such things.

. . .

Now, let’s see how you fair. Can you really spot a fake smile? Take the survey by clicking on the url above. p.s. you might need a Flash player.

Don’t forget to share your results in the comments below.

Happy hump day!

Housewife: A Case for the Title

Every home not only needs a woman, but every home needs a practical woman. A woman who can juggle her acts, smoothly don the hats of a Chief Executive Officer, Chief Economist, Chief Operating Officer, Chief Administrative Officer, Chief Strategic Officer, Chief Internal Officer, Chief Public Relations Officer, Chief Information Security Officer, as well as the Chauffeur, Chef, and Chief of the Family Fan Club, and still maintain her poise and sanity.

A married lady who stays home to take care of the needs of her home; is to be cherished because she happily wears all the numerous hats for which she is not compensated nor adequately appreciated. She’s often taken for granted in many homes because “it is her responsibility” to take care of the house/home, right? No! That’s wrong!

The housewife’s job is never done in a day. It’s a steady chore juggling to ensure that:

(1) the physical home is sparkling clean first and foremost, and that the ambiance of the internal decor is strikingly captivating and inviting to anyone especially such that the hubby is compelled to rush home after work and hardly wants to leave the comforts for a weekend getaway;

(2) love and peace fill all its chambers;

(3) the children love it so much they want to show it off while inviting their friends over rather than chasing after sleepovers;

(4) she also loves to call it her sanctuary, and

(5) she constantly provides (or cooks) her family’s favorite meals.

Wow … what a list of chores? Does the housewife ever get a break? She takes care of everyone, but who gets to pamper her? She who refreshes others, must herself be refreshed, right?

. . .

Before I continue, I applaud the men/husbands who not only cherish their wives, but help with the household chores, and should their wives be a stay-at-homer, compensate them by giving them allowances (sounds so archaic though) or freedom in the joint bank accounts realizing that two have become one. 

. . .

Men/Husbands, please know that your wives are reasonable and sensible human beings. Once women are convinced that both are on the same page, they will handle the joint financials at a profit! (This statement can further be blogged another day). Will be interesting to hear the viewpoints of men/husbands on this too. 

“A thrifty woman is better than a great income. A good wife and health are a man’s best wealth”

Charles H. Spurgeon

Men, please share your thoughts on this point (i.e., that women are reasonable and can profitably manage the joint account) by commenting below.

History to Present Day of Housewifing:

Traditionally, married women stayed at home, not for economic reasons but, as an honor and in submission to the man/husband as the head of the household. My grandma often told us that it was taboo in their days for a married woman to have a 9-to-5 job. The few women who did had “the female” professions such as nurses or teachers; not the CEO types nor were they ever seen in the boardroom. These women were seen as women who wanted to “wear-the-pants,” aka domineering.and in church-ish language could be termed, Jezebels.

Please read this article for more on historical housewifing: https://www.historic-uk.com/CultureUK/The-1950s-Housewife/

Modern-day reasons for staying at home however are more for economic reasons. For example, child/daycare costs are astronomical, especially in a state like California where the 2019 GDP is $3.1 trillion (https://www.statista.com/statistics/248023/us-gross-domestic-product-gdp-by-state/). According to the Economic Policy Institute, the average daycare monthly cost in California is almost a $1,000 (https://www.epi.org/child-care-costs-in-the-united-states/) compared to $500 in Alabama whose 2019 GDP was $203.97 million. Understandably, daycare cost, like every other cost, is relative. However, $500 in Alabama is a huge expense for young families with infants and toddlers, coupled with the stress of wondering whether the daycare will provide the best care. It, therefore, makes good economic sense to have one parent stay home to care for the children.

Benefits of Stay-at-homers:

  • The truism of the adage “there’s no mom like one’s mother” becomes inevitable;
  • It’s cheaper as the money that could have been paid to the daycare provider can now be channeled to other use;
  • Children are in safer environments at home than with strangers;
  • Children are healthier as there’s no ping-ponging of sicknesses that stems from having the kids together particularly during the COVID-19 period;
  • The children are well-rested as the wife/mother doesn’t have to wake them up early for daycare so that she can be prompt for work; 
  • As the children grow and begin school and/or sports, they have Mom to always drop off/pick up on time instead of looking for help or leaving them till late before picking up;
  • Family time is valued as the husband can return to home-cooked meals, which can be eaten together as a family;
  • There’s overall peace of mind.

Disadvantages of being a housewife:

  • The man-husband becomes the sole provider;
  • As a result of #1 above, there’s a higher financial burden on the man-husband;
  • This in turn causes stress in the home;
  • In today’s living standards where two wage-earners have become essential, the opportunity-cost living on one income means some things would have to be forgone and must-haves now become luxuries;
  • The woman/wife does not have a “she” money and has to rely on the bacon brought home by her hubby;
  • There’s a stigma of inadequacy that the woman/wife suffers in her circle of family and friends;
  • “If their husbands are rich, they are frequently berated for being lazy; if they are immigrants, for keeping children from learning the language and ways of their host country.” https://www.nytimes.com/2010/07/21/world/europe/21iht-LETTER.html
  • It can be boring as the woman/wife is alone at home.

It’s a Choice!

Most housewives are educated and have chosen this path for several and varied reasons that range from personal, economic, religion, to class status. Some are because the woman/wife wanted to, or the man/husband requested that the woman stay home, or both agreed that it was the best decision for them as a family.

Whatever any family’s decision is, it is time for society to acknowledge this sector of people as essential hard workers and treat them as respectable as any working woman. Interestingly though, one article noted that “… the economic value housewives create remains within their home …” This is a sad statement to make as I believe that there is a spillover benefit that is derived from the contributions of the housewife towards her husband and children.

A 2017 New York Post article stated that millennials are forgoing the career/professional path for the comfort of the home/kitchen. Read the article here: https://nypost.com/2017/05/24/im-a-millennial-woman-and-id-rather-be-a-housewife/

I have personally been on both sides of the coin – as a professional lady as well as a housewife. If I have to choose another life, I will choose to stay at home. The housewife does a lot more with her time being home than manicure and pedicure. She needs to be compensated for the many hats that she wears or be openly appreciated.

"Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." 
- Proverbs 31:31 (NIV)

Please share your thoughts by commenting below. Thanks for reading.

Steer clear of work-at-home scams | FTC Consumer Information

As the Coronavirus continues to spread, you may be looking for ways to make money without ever stepping foot outside your door.
— Read on www.consumer.ftc.gov/blog/2020/07/steer-clear-work-home-scams

. . .

Everyone ought to subscribe to the Consumer FTC email/blog. The department notifies one on trending consumer issues such as this one and others, including retail stores or companies whose privacy issues have been violated and what one should do about it. Varied topics, such as health & fitness, money & credit, jobs, privacy, & online security are blogged. I have gotten beneficial information over the years from the site and know that you will too.

To subscribe, go to consumer.ftc.gov/blog, scroll down and click the [Get email updates] button.

Please share your thoughts below on the content of the site. Thank you.

The Two Voices Every Leader Chases – Dr. Stephen R. Graves

The Two Voices Every Leader Chases – Dr. Stephen R. Graves
— Read on stephenrgraves.com/articles/read/the-two-voices-every-leader-chases/

Sharing another of Dr. Graves’ articles. Every leader must be able to discern these two voices; Voice of Inspiration and Voice of Instruction, amidst the daily and/or occasional confusion. Every leader must also know that God is not always in the midst of noise or everything that “seems good.”

Find your own circle (or team) of Inspiration and Instruction. In finding it, every leader must also know not to force or outstay it if it does not feel right.

Here’s to the best you (leader)! Enjoy the article and check him out as well at stephenrgraves.com.

More Is Caught Than Taught – Dr. Stephen R. Graves

More Is Caught Than Taught – Dr. Stephen R. Graves
— Read on stephenrgraves.com/articles/read/more-is-caught-than-taught/

Leadership. Leaders. Leaders and Leadership. We are all leaders in our own ways though many don’t ascribe to the title and some think that it’s humility to be titled a follower. We need both leaders and followers. As a matter of fact, every leader must be a follower or learn to follow at times; it’s a form of life balance.

The truth is that we are all one form of a leader in many ways.

I love leaders and leadership. I know that I haven’t blogged on it yet. Well, I’m sharing the first article/blog. I signed up for a webinar featuring Stephen R. Graves. It’s my first time hearing of him (I realize that there are a whole lot more great folks out there that I’m still yet to meet!) and decided to check him out before the day. This article/blog straight away caught my attention as it’s one of my favorite phrases.

The probability of leaders having like followers is higher than having dissimilar followers. Needless to say, leaders have to lead well.

Some things are taught, but many are caught. This phrase is particularly true with families. Without being specifically told, we find ourselves doing the same things we watch our parents do. We inherit their habits, styles, mannerisms, likes and dislikes, etc. My father loved to travel. When he does, we jest on how he packs like a woman because he overpacks. I realize now that I do the same; granted that I am the lady. And my daughters jest me on overpacking 😜. I justify my packing lol by responding that I do not want to buy things out there that I have at home and could have brought with me.

Guess what?! I now notice my daughters doing exactly the same! They caught my habit!

In the Bible, Elisha caught Elijah’s anointing and received a double-portion.

In essence, we ought to be mindful of all that we do because we never know who is watching!

What do you think? Leave your comments below. I hope you also learned something from Dr. Graves’ article.

Peace.

Moinmoin

Moinmoin is a favorite dish in Nigeria and some African countries. It is extraordinarily rich in protein as well as iron as it is made from beans.

Nigerians use the red (some call it orange) beans, but black-eyed beans are equally good.

The optional ingredients below is used in making the seafood Moinmoin. You can add other seafood items to it as desired.

Likewise, for all meat Moinmoin, suggested optional items would be corned beef, gizzards, cow liver, and/or kidney. You can use all or only one of the meat substitutes; or your can add your choice of meat; the choice is yours. The items must be boiled (add water and seasonings to items in a saucepan, cover, and place over medium heat to boil) and cubed.

Combo Moinmoin could also be made using combination of all the items; seafood, meats, and chicken.

. . .

Moinmoin can be eaten a la carte for breakfast or paired with rice, beans, or fried plantain for lunch or dinner.

Prayer: What you may not know about it

Today, I want to talk about prayers. This issue has been togging on my heart to share. So, here it is:

[ Quoted scriptures are from the King Janes Version of the Holy Bible ]

“If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”
‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭7:14‬

What is Prayer?

Prayer (or praying) is a form of communication between people and God. It is merely a conversation which can be in the form of a request, call (or shout) for help, thanksgiving, supplication, seeking, or showing gratitude. Knowing when to engage in one form of prayer over the other is key to answered prayers. I deem prayer as a form of humility where I’m telling Father God that I cannot do “this thing” by myself, but with Him “I can do all things…” (Philippians 4:13)

Lord Jesus prayed (Matthew 26:36-44). We also can learn from his manner of prayer. Every religion prays; Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, even the dark kingdoms, etc. The difference is distinguishable in the channel/source of the prayer.

Prayers can be in the individual’s local or heavenly language. The local language as in English, Spanish, Yoruba, Chinese, Mandarin, Tagalog, Hebrew, Swahili, etc, or any other native dialect.The heavenly language is when the individual speaks in tongues.

Speaking in tongues is in the New Testament and can either be a gift or can be desired. Because it is in the New Testament, speaking in tongues is still relevant and powerful today. Please note that speaking in tongues is different from chanting. Because all truths are parallel; some might say that speaking in tongues and chanting are similar. This blog/platform is not to debate that stance.

Which is more effective?

Personally speaking, there is a time and place for each; that is, praying in one’s local language versus praying in tongues.

“Yet in the church, I had rather speak five words with my understanding, that by my voice I might teach others also, than ten thousand words in an unknown tongue.”
‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭14:19‬

I love praying in tongues as it not only strengthens the inner (spirit) man, (1 Corinthians 14:4) but most importantly it bypasses the individual’s mind/intellect and is a direct communication to God. (1 Corinthians 14:2)

Prayer Styles include:

  • silently or (keeping still in the presence of God)
  • fervently (James 5:16)
  • groaning before God
  • crying/weeping unto God (Hebrews‬ ‭5:7‬, Jeremiah‬ ‭11:14, 48:5‬, Psalm 141:1, Judges 6:7, etc.)

These forms of prayer are particularly famous with King David in the Bible. We also can adopt them.

. . .

Prayer Postures

Kneeling is a favorite posture of prayer by a majority of people. Other anomalistic postures include prostrating before God (2 Samuel‬ ‭12:16‬b), standing, walking around, sitting, etc.

I know that God answers prayer any which way; irrespective of posture. The posture is not as important as one’s HEART.

. 🙏 .

Prayer can be said privately, in a group of two or more, or corporately as in a church setting.

“Not all private prayer is effective, but private prayer is rewarding”

Unknown, Grace for Purpose

The private prayer, the one-to-one communication, is the type when you enter into your “closet” aka your designated place of meeting with Father God.

“…, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; …”

Matthew‬ ‭6:6‬a

I love this video from Grace for Purpose YouTube page. Please listen to it as it will bless you and your day.

Group prayer. “Where two or more are gathered in my name, there will I be.” Group prayer is when you join with a spouse or friend(s) to pray; bringing an issue before God and coming into an agreement over the issue.

Corporate prayer. It has often been said that prayer is the foundation of the church. Many churches designate about an hour for special prayers where church members (often with the prayer group leading if the church has such a group. If not church elders or leaders lead the prayer/prayer points by coming together to pray for the church, its members, church’s needs, cities, nations, and/or for other specific needs.

What is the best time to pray?

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Jesus woke up early to pray (Mark 1:35). The above Grace for Purpose video also collaborates this. As such, I prefer the morning as the best time to pray.

Most people often start their days getting physically-charged by exercising and/or going to the gym. Others do yoga for the mental-/emotional-charge. I prefer starting my day with prayer to be spiritually-charged as it takes care of all three – physical, mental, and emotional. Besides, one might get a revelation for the day! One unique word direct from God (aka revelation) to your spirit man, can take care of something(s) that could have taken you years to resolve!

Having said that, if you start your day with prayer, it is only wise to end your day also with a prayer. But, prayer in between your work (business or college) days is equally beneficial.

. . .

The Holy Bible talks of other prayer times such as the morning watch (1 Samuel 11:11), middle watch (Judges 7:19, Luke 12:38), third watch, and fourth watch (Matthew 14:25, Mark 6:48). The watches in this usage are specific three-hour blocks of time in a 24-hour clock.

According to The Global Watch, “The Hebrew watch was divided into three watches, the first, middle and morning watch. As the Roman influence and supremacy was established, the number of watches increased to four and were described in numerical order

  1. 1st (6pm – 9pm);
  2. 2nd (9pm – 12am);
  3. 3rd (12am – 3am); and
  4. 4th (3am – 6am).”

I do not suppose that God cares about the time one prays because He has specific assignments for each person. While some are early risers/worms, some are night owls. Some people work regular hours, while some work night or grave shifts. The hours and duration that you designate for meeting with Father God will accordingly be uniquely you.

. . .

I will recommend prayer before a business meeting; pray for your business outcomes, and even your customers and suppliers. It is wisdom to commit every business decision to God even before starting it. I also recommend that one prays while at work, during your lunch break, while running your errands, in the gym, etc. Pray particularly for your home, spouses, children, family, your doctors, lawyers, accountants, your children’s friends, and their families, your children’s teachers; practically pray for everyone and everything that concerns you.

Did I hear your sigh that this is a lot of praying? It seems so, but all the above could be done in about 15 minutes. Once you get started, the fifteen minutes would seem insufficient that you’ll desire to increase your time with Father God as you deem fit. Incremental times of 15 minutes are great till you get to where you feel you’ve given your best time. One-liner prayers, such as Help me! or Heal me! are equally as effective. Your prayer does not always have to be lengthy or repetitive because Father God is not so interested in how long (quantity of time), but the quality of your time is more important to Him. The quality of time with Papa God should be free from distractions. Give Him your best time; be it 15, 30, or 60 minutes.

It is also best to designate a praying spot and block out the praying time. Once designated, be diligently prompt and consistent as He will always meet you there.

Please note that though some people might have a gift of praying, realize that none was born a prayer warrior. Every prayer warrior began somewhere. I remember when I always wished that I would not be called upon to pray at home-groups.

. . .

I will be amiss if I do not mention that prayer without corresponding action is futile. Once you’ve brought your issues (or concerns) before Father God, you need to get up and take the necessary step(s) for action. After you’ve prayed, believe that Father God has heard you and be expectant (Mark 11:24). Father’s answer to your prayer often falls into either a:

“Yes” – you receive exactly what you asked for;

“No” – you do not receive exactly what you prayed for, but you get something that Father God knows you either need or is better for you.

“Wait” – this has to do with the timing of your request and means that your request will be answered later.

. . .

Generally speaking, prayer ought to be soothing and should never agitate the person, the person’s spirit, nor a situation. Any prayer agitating anyone’s spirit is often not a godly prayer.

🙏🏾.🙏.🙏🏼.

I hope you learned a new thing or two. Please comment below to share. May you be richly rewarded publicly what you have spent your private time doing in the Name of Jesus.

Caveat: this blog on prayer is not exhaustive. There’s much more that can be written on the topic. But I hope this helps on your journey to praying and spending time with Father God.

Peace.

Mental Health: Women and Home Management

www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/what-is-the-mental-load

The awareness of mental health issues keep growing. Now we recognize a lot of health issues (that lead to diseases) that previously had been ignored.

I came across this article via a Twitter feed. Informative and worth reading.

Women have been pitched into “holding the home forth.” Little do the men/husband/significant others realize that the home forth involves a lot – being the CEO, CIO, CSO (Chief Strategic Officer), CAO (Chief Administrative Officer), CFO, CIO (Chief Internal Officer), CPRO (Chief Public Relations Officer), and Chief chauffeur. Ladies, let me know if I omitted any title. At the end of the day, the woman is exhausted and has no gas left for other important tasks. Yes, women can delegate the chores if they can afford it. But for those who can’t, this article will help on how to manage yourself and your home. Enjoy and share your thoughts by commenting below.

Peace.

Understanding the Grief and Loss Cycle

This is so true and helpful for everyone irrespective of whether or not one has lost a loved one. Since death is inevitable, knowing beforehand the different phases of grief, and when it does happen to be prepared, can help one navigate those moments.

I went through the five cycles by Dr. Perry when I lost two loved ones within six weeks. I was particularly angry because I had wrestled with God to heal them both (a blog topic for another day) and felt confident that they would be healed. I called one of them to inform that I would be visiting. Unfortunately, I did not make it to see either of them. It is my opinion that a few family members are still grieving the loss.
Just as I finally accepted the loss, almost four years after, we lost another loved one. These losses have had their toll on the family, that makes Kristina McMorris’ quote equally true. But, in the memory of the departed loved ones, we will not allow the world to prevail but for the departed to keep smiling and hailing us on.

Dr. Eric Perry’s Self-Help Blog

Written by Dr. Eric Perry
Image Credit: Pixabay


“The whole world can become the enemy when you lose what you love.” ~Kristina McMorris

The cycle of life is both beautiful and heartbreaking. From the moment of our birth, we share a common destiny with the rest of the world. The mortality that connects us makes life that much more remarkable. Knowing that death awaits us and our loved ones may be a haunting and difficult thought to bear. Truly, one of the most difficult and painful moments of a person’s life will be the death of a loved one. At these moments, grief is a normal and healthy response to loss. For some, the death of a loved one will result in overwhelming and devastating emotions that cannot be fully processed alone.

The loss may affect the ability to function in everyday life and maylead to depression, anxiety, and other…

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We wear many hats and should refrain from limiting our analysis of issues to a singular

Photo by Artem Beliaikin on Pexels.com

I propose that anyone who has lived at least a couple of decades on planet earth, will undoubtedly have some things and values that can be shared such as experiences in life, career, business, gifts, talents, etc. These valuable things transcend family, education, career, business, cultures, and more. The more the decades on earth, the deeper, varied, and sometimes hilarious the experiences. Generally speaking, the 40-/50-year old undoubtedly would have more life experiences than the 18-/25-year old. Only in few rare cases would there be exceptions to this statement.

“If elders could bequeath their experience and knowledge of life to children without the children making any mistakes, they would save them from a lifetime of heartaches.”

― Neena H. Brar, Tied to Deceit

One hat doesn’t always fit all

Having said this, I believe that people’s experiences and reactions to issues vary and are uniquely individualistic. However, we live in a culture that tries to put everyone, and every issue, in a box. For example, a father reacting to an issue concerning his son or daughter will exhibit certain emotions which might not necessarily be objective because it concerns his son/daughter. However, the same man will react differently to an issue concerning a colleague or subordinate at work; and even so differently if the subordinate were his son.

Another instance is in the medical field where certain medical guides are used across board for everyone. For instance the BMI formula, which uses one’s weight and divides it by the square of one’s height, has become the yardstick to measure an individual’s obesity tendencies. (https://bit.ly/2W1c7jB)


The BMI does not take into consideration the ethic background (Asian ladies are generally petite in stature; whereas African ladies are generally “thick”). Barbie-type African ladies are often deemed to be malnourished. BMI also ignores muscle mass, bone density, or other body structures of the individual. Yet, BMI has been accepted in the USA as the norm for gauging obesity and we are all expected to accept it!

The point that I’m making is that we should analyze issues from varied points before forming a conclusion. But, should we choose to form a conclusion based on a specific viewpoint, we need to offer that viewpoint so that readers are aware of our stand. For example, a mother, might sign a petition for more prisons to be built so that criminals are taken off our streets. The mother is wearing her citizen’s hat. However, the mother, wearing her mother hat, might not be enthused to having the prison built in her neighborhood.

The issues we talk, write, or blog would be analyzed, wearing different hats, and with the purpose to better inform the reader. Since the issues are varied, the audience will also be varied. The audience will eventually be narrowed down to a niche. Our hope is that the target niche, within the year, would hopefully have learned a thing or two from the wisdom nuggets shared.

Happy reading!